Posted by: morrowsl | July 16, 2011

A cave of my very own!!

Growing up in a three-bedroom house with two adults and five children didn’t allow for privacy of any sort.  The one bathroom had a lock, but we rarely used it because who wants to get out of the tub or off the pot to unlock it?  And yes, they certainly will just come on in regardless of what you’re doing.  My bedroom was shared with brothers and sisters alike until the older ones began to leave and make room.  And for a short while we actually increased the size of the family when my four cousins came to live with us following the deaths of their parents.  Even though we actually moved into a larger house during that time, we still all shared living space with someone else.  But there were, finally, two bathrooms in the “Cloudcrest house”, so called because that was the street it was on.  Our other house was the “Lyndalyn house” and wasn’t sold when we moved so that my parents could go back to it when we all finally left.  Of course, nothing goes as planned, but more about that later.

In the Cloudcrest house, there were two bedrooms upstairs on either side of the bathroom.  Each had a small storage space in the gable end and a large walk-in closet on the front.  My youngest brother took up residence in one of the large closets (it really WAS that big) and shared a bathroom with four girls.  Poor kid!!  For reasons I won’t go into now, I really didn’t want to share my bedroom with my cousin and sought refuge anywhere but in our room.  My getaway was the gable closet where we’d mounted large mirrors over the shelves on either side of the room making a “make-up” area for Darlene and an “office” for me.  I spent many a long night typing away on an old standard typewriter I’d give anything to own still.  I shudder to think of anyone trying to sleep while I peck, peck, pecked out my poems and stories and hate mail for Darlene!!  And I wonder at the fact that I never suffered heat stroke up there so close to the roof with the door closed and no vent.  Well, I was a lot younger then.

Eventually my parents sold the Cloudcrest house and returned to our real home.  Daddy built a huge covered patio and Mother had her garden.  They worked and made improvements and plans.  But, as I said before, plans often get changed.  Four of the five of us kids moved back home.  At the same time.  Some with our own children!!!  My poor parents…

So, needless to say, my first ever apartment of my very own was like a palace to me!  Forget that it had a chilled water air system that provided zero cold air and a cracked toilet seat the maintenance man never fixed and a fridge that opened on the wrong side and enough cockroaches so I never felt totally alone.  I had two bedrooms (one for me and one for my two kids, as it should be!!) and sweet, blessed privacy!!  Well, sometimes.  I never did manage to have a complete round in the bathroom alone.

When I married (for the LAST time) I moved into a four-bedroom, two-bath, brick house that was probably the size of the Cloudcrest house, only all on one floor.  I was in paradise.  Almost.  I was still sharing all of that space with someone.  Several someones.  Oh, I could manage all the “me time” I wanted if I spent it in the kitchen and called out to anyone else that I needed help.  And every now and then I could actually get everything done in the bathroom without one single knock.  But my kids, being kids, rarely knocked and I spent quite a number of embarrassing moments tucked behind my bathrobe hanging from its hook with my bare backside pressed to the wall while one or the other of my children came parading through my room to get some item they couldn’t find anywhere else in the house and couldn’t be without for another nanosecond.

The result of all this sharing is that I am now, have been for some time in fact, very much a recluse when at all possible!!  Back then, I would take off for the grocery store, oftentimes sitting for a full hour in the parking lot, just to get some time to myself.  Now days, I have all of that I could possibly want and can’t see myself giving up even a second of it if I can avoid it.  As it was with my parents, my kids have moved in and out at random times since finishing school.  I enjoy them ever so much more as adults – they even knock now – and all of them understand my need to be alone.  I think all three of them are like-minded on that point; they aren’t as reclusive as I am, but they do like to be left totally alone now and then.

Now my problem is my mate.  He’s a good man and I truly love and respect him as much as is humanly possible.  But he watches the damn television every single waking hour and he’s driving me nuts!!!  Granted, he’s away from home through the week, but really that only makes it worse since I no sooner get used to the quiet again and he’s back!!

So, I am officially building my very own clubhouse.  No boys allowed.  A woman cave!!  I have my desks and my chairs, my pens and pencils, my papers and glues, my scissors and paints.  MY stuff in MY room!!  At last.  I don’t have to worry about making too much noise or having the lights on too late or mistakenly reading anyone’s diary they hid the keys to in a cup next to the Kleenex box full of eye shadow…  uh…  anyway, you get my point.  I’d love to have that old typewriter back but I’ve no idea what happened to it.  I do, however, have a vent, a ceiling fan, and a space heater.

But I might need to find a fridge…


  1. Sister, I do believe you have answered the question for women everywhere.”Woman Cave”

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